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"My wife did not want to go through the process of releasing those duties only to be thrust back into them again at a moment’s notice. Married service members can't share details of their work with their spouses, which can be frustrating to both partners.
This strain of that coming and going is amplified in a military family." 8. When most spouses come home, they swap stories about their days.
Now, Di Silverio writes mystery novels and parents her kids full time. Even though she expects to earn her master's degree this year, employers seem to be more interested in speaking about job opportunities to her husband, who retired from the Navy in 2010.
"Whenever folks learn that I am the wife of a military veteran, they always ask for my husband to be the person that they hire," she said.
Her husband's schedule is set only a month in advance and it's very hard for him to change it.
"It is a huge, unaddressed issue that can cause significant stress for military spouses." "There would be rumors about military wives hanging out at the clubs while their husbands were in the field," said Sgt. "The type of work soldiers deal with tend to attract partners that have similar attractions to duty, honor and commitment," added Phyfe, who served in the Army from 1980 to 1996 and now works with Vet Dogs, an organization that provides guide, service and therapy dogs to members of military with a disability. Military spouses can lose their sense of self, since their partners' career of service often takes precedence over theirs. Her daughter was not yet 2 and she was pregnant with her second child when she found out that she would be stationed in England.Di Silverio compares the fear of her husband getting hurt -- or worse -- in the field to a constant headache, "always lurking, keeping you a bit more on edge than you would normally be." When her husband was deployed to Iraq, her daughters were 3 and 5 and she was working as a deputy group commander."I almost welcomed the logistical difficulties of keeping our lives running, of coordinating day care and school and job and activities because it kept my mind occupied so I didn’t dwell on the danger [my husband] Tom might be in," Di Silverio said."In a military marriage, duty is first; everything else second,” said Perkins, who lives in Honolulu with her husband, an active-duty soldier in the Army, and their four children. Military wives are not as likely to cheat as their deployed husbands.A misconception about military marriage is that it frequently involves infidelity, according to Perkins.