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He’s either impulsive or, more likely, using you as a back-up girl when his other plans fell through. A grownup guy who truly wants to know you will get the message and ask you out ahead of time.A player or user guy will text you again in a few weeks wanting to see you that night. It’s all about how he FEELS when he’s with you, and he knows it.You probably know the guy who texts once in a while as a kind of check in.

Texting and dating definitely isn’t just for 20 year olds anymore. “Melissa” stayed up until 3 AM texting with her dude. She wants to know how to stop obsessing over him being The One.

I’ve seen countless women create complete fantasies and get drawn in — often before they even meet a man. With no tonality in messages, texting back and forth creates enormous opportunities to misread and misunderstand intent.

I can’t tell you how many emails I’ve received from coaching clients with a text conversation pasted in and the question: What do you think he means (aka WTF)????

They’ll text me non-stop for an entire weekend, totally disappear, and then email me ten days later.“Rules Girl” tactics are common: don’t return phone calls or texts for 48 hours, don’t pick up the phone for scheduled phone dates, etc. The disappearing, the game-playing, the crazy expectations, the mixed messages? It protected me from ever giving any man of quality a chance to see me or touch my soul. He told us that he loves women, “if only they weren’t so complicated.” And he graciously gave me permission to publish his email because he wants to help women understand more about how men feel, what they want and don’t want.

(This is another “Bobbi’s right”, fifty-year-old guys hate that type of stuff.) A woman who will initiate a few ‘how’s your day going? His frustration and his feelings of helplessness and inadequacy? When I knocked down that wall, and learned some new things, my heart opened and my love came into my life. He wants to help us all make better human connections!

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